//keep pushing, keep striving//
i may have done many extra curricular things in my life but have never been exceptional at them, just very average.

so if there's one thing within my control it's my grades

i haven't done enough in my life so i'm actually worth nothing if i don't get a fucking first class
if anything at all, i want people to look at my grades & be like "wow a first class that's pretty good!" instead of "wow a 2:1 thats not too bad, o hey you did piano and dance too.. but if you had a first... maybe we'd hire you"

had a mental breakdown last night because i couldn't do a past paper but after releasing all the bitter tears i felt better. i guess it's time to ditch the thought that i'd get math concepts in a split second like i used to. And it's just not possible to do papers at lightning speed (like A levels) anymore. time to readjust my expectations.

8 more days till finals are overrrrrr i got diz